Rilo Kiley came into my life when I was 16. I couldn't have found the California indie-rock band at a more pivotal time. At that age, I was dealing with two terrible relationships back-to-back that broke my spirit, while also feeling like an outsider in high school. Jenny Lewis's songwriting helped me find solace; her songs made me feel like she was the cool older friend guiding me through it all, validating my emotions, with songs like "Capturing Moods," "Go Ahead," and "Glendora."
But for the other teenage girls I knew, the musical icon they related to the most was Taylor Swift. At the time, I wrote off Swift, focusing on her imperfections. Her songs comparing herself to the popular cheerleader and wanting a fairytale romance felt infantile, and the slut-shaming in "Better Than Revenge" made me uncomfortable.
But four years ago, I began to realize that Swift and Lewis have far more in common than a certain ex. In 2016, I stumbled upon a playlist Swift made for iTunes from 2010. It's no longer available online, but it features Rilo Kiley's "Silver Lining" off the band's last album, Under the Blacklight. It's a ballad about finding strength in leaving behind an unhealthy relationship. When I noticed the track in the playlist, everything clicked.